I can play soccer

That is a lie.

Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, next to soccer.
-Loki in Dogma

But I did try. It is very tiring. And I am not good at it. I would much rather chill and listen to tunes. S’pose I’ve never really had endurance for those kinds of things. I’d probably be ok at rugby though. Not in the scrum of course, but I’d make a decent back. Despite being a skinny dude, or maybe because of it, I can take hits pretty well, and keep going. For a casual game, I’d prefer it to soccer. Plus, you can’t flying tackle people in soccer. That makes me sad. It is a shame rugby isn’t more popular in the states.
So with that, I present to you, soccer vs rugby:

And why not, a bit more: